A New Way of Looking at Mental Health
One of biggest issues men and women returning home from war struggle with is having to readjust to be a civilian again.
Have you ever watched an older movie for the second time and realized something you didn't the first time watching it? Did it have a different meaning to you? Were you able to relate to the movie differently than before?
Growing up in the 80's, the movie "Rambo - First Blood" was a hit. I watched that movie probably 20 times, possibly even more.
I knew I was going to go to the military at a very young age. I had so much military paraphernalia in my room I could've had my own military surplus store.
I had an Airborne flag on my wall, an F-16 model jet hanging from the ceiling staring right at me as I went to bed. I had Marine Corps posters, The Few. The Proud. The Marines.
I was military all the way. Little did I know that one day I would be in a war. A war where over 5,500 Americans would lose their lives. Like the Vietnam war, we lost more American service members after the war than from the war itself.
The Cost of Mental Health
Two years after returning home from Iraq, I lost a soldier who was on my team. He was my gunner, I was his team leader.
The day I got the call that he took his life, I couldn't believe it. My heart sank. I remembered every day that we spent together. All the dumb, crazy, and funny things he did. I remembered the time he had to get his wisdom teeth removed. We flew to Ballad Air Force Base to he can get them removed.
The first night we were there the base was mortared. We must have been bad luck because earlier that day we asked a soldier what the situation around base was. He said it had been a few weeks since any action had taken place. Great! Because, we were sleeping in canvas tents!
I learned a lesson that night. One that I will save and tell in another post.
Adjusting to Life As a Civilian
Towards the end of the movie, Rambo is finally going to have the chance to kill the Sheriff that harassed and had him tutored in jail. The Sheriff falls through the roof and lands on his back. Rambo wanting nothing more than to eliminate this man who would not leave him alone as he tried to return to be a civilian again.
Right when Rambo is about to kill the sheriff, Coronal Troutman, his old commander yells at him. Surprised to see the very man that he yearned to see again, is now standing there to stop him from making a terrible mistake.
Before Rambo can process everything, he begins to let out his anger, frustration, and hate towards the life he now is living. He served his country, and now he has no place to call home.
Next, Rambo, as he continues to throw things, comes to exhaustion, and yells, I flew helicopters in Nam, and now I can even keep a job parking cars!
I couldn't believe it. I watched this movie over 10-20 times and never knew the significance of that part of the movie.
Now, an Iraq War veteran, I could totally relate to what he is saying, and so can every other veteran who has struggled after returning home from war.
A Mission. A Purpose. At What Cost?
I protected generals, government officials, and distinguished visitors in and around Baghdad. It was a zero-error mission. I had three men on my team. I was responsible for over $250,000 worth of equipment, that was either on my body or hung from it. I even worked with the secret service when former Vice President, Joe Biden, came for a visit. The enemy would have wanted nothing more than to take out one of our generals and it was my job to not make this happen.
I can go on; however, now, being back home, nothing can compare to that experience, and nothing ever will. It was like being on top of the world. I had a purpose. I had a mission. I was a leader of men.
Back home, I'm expected to be just like everyone else. Except I'm not. No civilian would ever understand this. No one around me could understand what was going through my mind, my heart...my soul.
Is It A Mental Health Issue?
One day, I had gone to buy some clothes at a local Macy's. I went around closing time during the week when there would not be many people around.
I bought a few things and headed out to my truck. As I was walking towards my truck, there was a black garbage bag in plain sight right in the parking stall next to mine. It was extremely odd.
I stopped immediately. My heart began to race. What the fuck is this? Who in the fuck is messing with me? Black garbage bags reminded me of how the enemy would use to cover IED's with.
I hunkered down and began to scan the area just as I was trained. I looked at the roof tops, every car, light posts, every corner, and every person around for threats. After what felt like an hour standing there. I got myself together and said, fuck it! And I walked right to my truck and got in. If there was a bomb in that bag, fuck it!
I turned on my truck and speed out of that parking lot. I was pissed! I thought somebody was fucking with me.
I knew I could not continue reacting that way. I needed to get help and I did.
The unfortunate thing is it would take several years to really feel like I was improving. In fact, it would be 7 years later when I got my brain scanned.
Is It A Brain Health Issue?
I am fascinated with the brain. I absorbed every bit of information I can get my hands on about the brain, the mind, the subconscious. I love this stuff.
After my brain scanned it revealed to me that I did not have a mental health issue, but a brain health issue. My brain is overactive in some parts, which can cause me to be hyperactive, hyper-vigilant, obsessive compulsive and with clear evidence of PTSD.
Wow! Right there in front of me sat scans of my brain. Where was this seven years ago? Why doesn't the VA do this?
My love for the brain saved my life! If I wasn't so interested in the brain, I don't think I ever would have ever spent the money to get the scans. Therefore, I question the whole idea of mental health.
Mental Health Disorders
Of course, there are mental health disorders, but the "medicalization" of healthcare just wants to take care of symptoms and not the causes. This is sick care, not health care. For every ache and pain, there are medications for that. Look at all the conditions that have been created over the last two decades. Restless leg syndrome?
I can take medication, but I choose not to because of the side effects. Luckily, there are natural supplements that have been effective for me. This does not take away how my brain works, but I am able to work with how my brain functions and take natural supplements to keep me living well.
How many other men are suffering thinking they have a mental health issue when it is a brain health issue? Many men will turn to self-help books and courses and try to improve their life somehow, yet, fail because their brain isn't functioning properly.
The truth is we all have unique experiences. Fortunately, humans are very resilient. We can get through some very tough experiences. As men, we put ourselves into our work and families, but rarely do we take an active role into our health and well-being. At least this has been what I have come across in speaking with men.
I am not qualified to say if someone has a mental health issue. I am told that I have a mental health issue, but I don't. I have a brain health issue. Yet, how many men are told they have a mental health issue and in reality, they don't and they carry the negative idea that something is wrong with them. This is one of the reason's why I have chosen to become a men's health coach.
What do you think? Post your comments below.
Stay S.T.R.O.N.G.!